What a week.

Still hanging out, this week I've been hanging out with Margie and we've talked so much. Quite amazing that we still have stuff to talk about.

I've had my niggly pains all week. They are strong in the evening and then go away. Hurts most going from sitting to standing, means I'm not standing up too straight.

I have seriously thought it would happen during this week, quite annoying that it hasn't. I really don't want to be induced, I'm not looking forward to ringing the delivery suite tomorrow, I feel they will try to talk me out of it. They ALWAYS try to talk me out of it. Quite sick of that really.

Had an emotional breakdown the other night, sobbed and sobbed. All just nerves and anxiety of the unknown. Worried about how to parent two little kids and my almost teenager.

Oh that is some good news, phoned the school to ask how Mark was going as I can't make it to the parent/teacher interview night which is on Monday (the year level adviser said I had a pretty good excuse), so I spoke with Mr Dibley who said that Mark was a bright, polite, respectful boy and his name hadn't come up at any of the meetings - which is a great thing as they really only discuss the troublemakers - so I'm a very happy mum! He said he has been nominated for some academic awards that will be presented at the assembly in the second week back in term two! Doesn't mean he'll get them, but the nomination itself is pretty damned brilliant! My son - an academic award - the two just don't quite go together. But as I have mentioned previously, he did well in his science assignment, has passed the practical part of music, is doing fantastic in PE (well duh, totally the opposite of his mum there), is great at maths, after a serious almost fail on an early test where he got 50%.

Our lives are slowly being engulfed by football. It seems to be the main topic of conversation either between Jamie and I, and of course most of our friends. Its going really well and I do (sort of) hope I can be there for the first game. I get to watch two of my boys play tomorrow (Mark as a player and Jamie as the umpire!!!) so actually its all three of them, because Ryan is a little goer and chases the ball down at every opportunity.

MUST REMEMBER TO TAKE MORE PHOTOS.

ooohhhhh

I'm having a baby.. within the week.

Now for the back story. Went to the hospital today for my appointment, saw Dr Butt again (she's really nice, shame about the name) I've seen her three times now, and she remembered my story, which is lovely. We discussed my medical issues - RLS, insomnia, reflux and generally being 39 weeks preggers. She took my BP, which has remained consistent for the entire pregnancy 115/70 (or there abouts), she measured my tummy which is perfectly proportional to my gestational stage, listened to the heart beat.

That appeared to be that.

She asked if I had any other questions.... Yes, actually I do, how far along do "they" let you go before intervening.

Hmmm she said, 41.5weeks which is 10 days over!

OMG, NO. Margie is here already, I can't still be two weeks away, she'll be home by then.

I recall Kellie telling me recently that "they" don't do inductions on women who have had C-sections as its too harsh on the scar. Dr Butt disagreed, yes we do inductions and quite frequently. There is the option of an Atad catheter to dilate the cervix, mechanical "breaking of the waters", prostoglandins (which she advised against as once its there they can't undo it) and oxytocin drip. She dashed off to consult with the consultant who said yes he's happy to authorise an induction via Atad catheter at term!

Which means Sunday!
This Sunday!!

I have to call the delivery suite at 2pm on Sunday (unless baby is already here) and they will organise for me to come in for the catheter, can go home with it if I wish, or stay. Up to me, maybe.

So that means the Storer's will have a new son by the 4th April.

Relaxing and waiting.

Bub slept in until 8am, Mark woke me at 7:30 and I didn't get up, he said "please get up, I want to talk to you", talk to me here darling (like Florence Nightingale, I'm holding court on my bed), and he did. Funny kid, he has an excursion on Friday to the Stockton Sand dunes for sand boarding (bloody fun) and he told me today that they are doing more than just sand boarding, they will be on a 4WD bus and then to the aquatic centre, well duh... I read the note. Trying to get him to read stuff is like pulling teeth.

I read last night of a blogger who is giving up Facebook for Lent... couldn't do it, well maybe I could, but don't want to do it. I should be on it less. I like that I don't Farmville any more, but commenting on status updates is my addiction.

Mamamia.com.au is down this morning, but its just come back online. Phew...
"ALL children need is to know that they are loved" is first line of the article, should be nice I hope. It was by Catherine Deveny, whom I normally can't stand, she has a stand-up show called "God is Bullshit", gee ain't that nice! But this bit of parenting advice is pure gold. Kids don't need their own room, every toy that hits the shelf, they can eat Weetbix for dinner occasionally... but the main thing they need to know is that they are loved. Awww.

Our plan of getting our business to rank better in Google, and then make us more money has made Jamie interested in this baby blog, Facebook and well not quite Twitter, but maybe. He is really working on Search Engine Optimisation. Takes a lot of time, but seems to be worth it.

Pregnancy related news - namuch. My feet have swollen to epic proportions but that makes the RLS not be so bad. Twinges in my abdo all the time, but not labour, heightened anxiety, very low threshold to aggravation. Poor Mark is bearing the brunt of it. He doesn't listen to me! He thinks its funny when Ryan falls over (which in a way, it is funny), so he'll push him, or trip him, or grab a leg, so that he has to fall over. I say to stop, and Mark pretends not to hear, so I say stop then I yell.
Last night Ryan found a small glass on the floor, and was walking with it, holding it carefully. I had my eye on him, next thing I saw that Mark had Ryan's ankle, "don't hurt him or make him fall" I said. Next thing over he goes! I speak for a reason, he could hurt himself. Oh I didn't mean to make him fall. UTTER BULLCRAP. So I yell again, and Mark does the pathetic "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to"

I think Mark thinks I'm just riding him, being mean, but I want a calm happy household that doesn't yell, and I'm the yeller! I know its b/c I'm stressed, but don't know how to de-stress at the moment.

The thought of labour is scaring me, what if we have a problem again? What if I can't contact Jamie? What if it happens really quickly? What if this baby dies? How will i cope with two babies? What if he's not healthy? See all these what ifs? I'm sick of being in constant ache (its not pain, but ache), I want to have him today, I'm super stressed. PLEASE let this baby come today.

Still out of sorts.

Feeling very "wrong" the last couple of days.

Very sensitive to everything.

Feeling lost, grumpy, argumentative, achy, tired and generally not myself.






The labour (now technically known as pre-labour) stopped around 11pm last night. Went from 4 - 11 and was bearable. Now just waiting for the next round.

Going to eat something today. I have avoided food like products, relying more on cereal that last couple of days, that might help. Tonight we are having "Honey Mustard Chicken" one of my families favourites. Might do it with pasta. Had a "spare" cake in the freezer and have turned it into dessert, have made it a SORRY cake. Even wrote sorry on the top, that's how guilty I'm feeling for the last few days.

I have a feeling

That my labour is starting. Just the prelim stages at present.

Aching across my abdomen.
Feeling nauseas.
Ache across my lower back.
Needing to pee.
Comes and goes.

Cured myself

Finally my boys came home around 3:30ish....

So I picked myself out of my doldrums and went about fixing stuff.

I vacuumed all of the front half of the house, completely dusted my room.
Picked everything up off the floor from the front half of the house - no mean feat when 8 months pregnant.

There is a decent "pile" on the spare bed, where do I put three suitcases??? Will fix this with the fellas tomorrow.

The lounge room gets done regularly.

Cleaned the benches and table in the kitchen.

Did 4 loads of washing and hung them out.

Ate a healthy dinner.

All that needs doing now is the floor swept and mopped! This is going to be huge challenge. Everyone hates sweeping in this house. I really want a swivel sweeper to pick up the shit that the middle boy drops, and I'm sure the youngest will follow suit in about 10 months time!

Picture - just because I can. Mark is doing an assignment for music and he chose Bon Jovi "because my mum likes and knows a lot about them" He did the worst presentation with his writing and I shall be making him rewrite it tomorrow with some effort this time, but here is the picture "we" chose. Its from the fan photos on their official website.

Crappy Day

I don't want to be negative, but I feel all alone.

Jamie is extremely busy, don't fully agree with what he's doing, but he's entitled to do it.

Mark is so disagreeable and if I should show that I'm annoyed with it, he puts on the whiniest of voices and its drama central. We're butting heads like nothing else. If I say black - he says white. Has to say NO to everything. Whatever I suggest is wrong wrong wrong. I'm very frustrated by this.

Ryan is clingy, doesn't want to be cuddled, but be held whilst I stand up, a sitting down hold does not suffice. He doesn't want to be held by Jamie if he know I'm around. As lovely as it is that he loves me... I'm exhausted.

I have so much housework to do. The state the carpet is in, makes it need a vacuum about twice a week now. It NEVER looks nice, it never will look nice. It needs to be ripped up and replaced.

My bathroom is disintegrating, the bench is falling apart, the sink and bath need either replacing or resurfacing. The shower is in awful condition and it just won't clean.

The floor in the office is falling apart.

If you look at everything from about knee height its ok. Some cornices are still in need of finishing.

I'm really low today.

I think Jamie and I need (really NEED) a date night together, no children. Just need to find a babysitter for that, feel I can't ask people.. but know that I can.

Self esteem at an all time low I think.

Very uncomfortable, my back is aching, my knees and ankles are aching, I'm tired and down in the dumps.....

Will report back tomorrow with a sunnier disposition.

Shopping

and Christy are not really friends.

I want to be like a real girl and enjoy shopping. But to enjoy shopping I think you have to buy stuff and I just can't.

It was suggested by a work colleague to go to Pulp for shoes. I'm not buying shoes at the moment due to oedema, but for after the baby is born, I'd like some winter boots to wear to make me feel cool. (I was going to link in their website, but OMG they don't have one.) Anyway this friend said their prices were pretty good and they often have buy one get one half price sales. Well the cheapest I saw was $79 and the boots that I would have liked were $140. I just can't do that.

I don't know how my weight loss will go post baby#3 so looking at clothes is a loss. I would like to dress cool-y like Rachel, but feel I will look like mutton dressed up as lamb. Rachel is a good 10 years younger than me. I have never been a thrifter, I'm not a sewer (to re-style stuff that is a bit too old fashioned). I'd love to wear dresses but never have. I've never been a thin person, my boys are not supportive of any change in my style (that's the husband included). But I think I'll try. I'm sick of the boring clothes I wear. They are not flattering, not interesting and yes they are comfortable, sometimes they are just plain embarrassing.

Just because I'm a stay at home mother for the time being, doesn't mean I can't look nice. This is gong to be a challenge, but one I hope I can fulfil.

Other stuff from my life

Interesting day...

1. I've pretty much decided to attempt a VBAC. I'm very comfortable with this decision now. It will mean that I can recover quickly (supposedly), still drive and go to the appointments. The doctors have agreed that I can have an epidural quite early in the labour. Now my main problem will be convincing the midwives that I need one. So surprised with myself.

2. Ryan walked a bit more today. He went from the laundry to the computer desk. Jamie was rolling backwards on the computer chair encouraging him to keep on walking.

3. Mark is much MUCH MUCH improved. He's been in bed before 9.30 for the last two nights, he's doing his homework, eating his dinner and being polite. I'm quite confused. But am seriously liking the new Mark.

The highs and lows of Centrelink

A totally necessary evil. Very happy to have them on board for my Paid Parental Leave.

As some may know, I filled in the online form for PPL, at the end it said that I had to take my Proof of Citizenship to the Wallsend office of Centrelink.

Let me get this straight (whilst I hang my head in shame for some of it), I have been on the dole, single parent pension, baby bonus, child care allowance and probably some family tax benefit somewhere along the line since about 1997 (the earliest I can remember). I had to show complete proof of identity when I first applied.

I have had the same Customer Reference Number, I have updated my details whenever necessary.

So why, when applying for PPL do I need to bundle up my toddler, get in the car and drive to Centrelink to show a form that most likely they have seen before. Even the dude behind the desk, said "well this doesn't make much sense, but I'll photocopy it anyway" He was almost going to ask for the original when I had a fully certified copy. I have been an Australian Citizen since 1984. Never changed, probably never will. Just a strange over the top system.

Oh and hooray, I have to go back with proof of birth to actually start getting my money. Gee I hope I can send someone for that!

Thought Processes.

Once again, a warning, proper names of body parts are being mentioned in this post.

So another appointment with the Obstetrician today. Had to be a feral and bring Ryan with me, he was very well behaved, ate a lot and drank a lot, even read some books - not his style.

Today was the "official" meeting about choosing Caesarean Section (CS) or Vaginal Deliver after Caesarean (VBAC). It was the official meeting in my head, it was really just a regular appointment.

Anyway I met with Dr Butt (lol) who is a GP who moonlights at the antenatal clinic, she is amazing, I really like her. She remembered me from two weeks ago, knew my story. The results of the "cord scan" were not in my notes, but I was able to tell her the result - no knot. Then I admitted what I've been thinking for the past several weeks... I've lost my excuse for a CS. But still the fear of giving birth is very real, I have a low pain threshold and am frightened of being trapped in any one position for any length of time because of my Restless Leg Syndrome (RLS). She said there is no reason I could not have an early epidural, even just get the catheter in place and not put drugs in until its really necessary. I like the idea of that.

So after vowing never to give birth "naturally" ever again, I'm staring down the barrel of it again. Will have to read a book about what to expect.


Main reasons are:

1. Its major surgery
2. Can't drive for 6 weeks.
3. Can't lift my little angel Ryan for probably those 6 weeks.
4. Still have to keep on living.
5. No real reason (anymore) to have a CS
6. I did it last time.
   
7. They hopefully won't lie to me and give me my epidural.

Of course, should it all go pear shaped, very happy to have my CS.

Mark's birth story, and other memories from long ago - from my faded memory.

Sorry - digital photography was not around at this time, so there is a lack of appropriate photos... lots to read though.

I've not written about Mark's birth before. He was 10 days late! Braxton Hicks contracts for about two days before hand, then on the 12th June, 1998 at 2am I got my first contraction. I remember I was lying on the couch at mum & dad's house (where I was living at the time) because my sleep was pretty crap back then (deja-vu). I know it caused me to wake up and stand up in the the space of one second. I woke mum (cos I'm really nice like that) and she ran me a bath, I sat in the bath, or wandered the house in the beginning of my labour. I don't recall it being too awful, the contractions were far-ish apart and it was all managable except during the actual contractions. Around 5ish Mum cracked it and woke up Vince (my then sort-of partner and Mark's birth father who was also staying at their place) and told him to get dressed and help! Mum and Vince didn't get along so good, everyone including me knew he wasn't the right man for me.

So around 6ish we called the hospital - St George's in Kew when it was a maternity hospital - and they said to come in. The drive too 3 contractions to get there.. so maybe 15 minutes.

When we got there, Vince had to book me in, as he was my "partner" what a crock, should have been Mum. Anyway... I'll try and continue without further barbs at Vince ok.

I was taken to a birthing suite and the midwife hooked me up to a CTG machine, which is a belt around the belly to check on the heart rate. Then the midwife left... or collective memory says at least an hour. I wasn't suffering too much, had the gas for the contractions, but I was pretty crap at using that. My birth plan stated I wanted to walk, sit on the big ball, have a shower and here I was trapped in the bed with a CTG machine around my belly. Mum was doing all the "work" relaxing me, Vince held my hand (oops was that a barb?)

I think from about 8ish I was starting to lose the plot, yelling at people that "I don't want to breathe" when they suggested I breathe the gas through the contractions, the midwife asked "would I like some pethidine".. (again my birth plan said no pethidine because it makes the baby floppy") I remember this statement that I made "Am I in enough pain yet for pethidine", the midwife suggested that I was. So pethidine was given... noice.

After about another hour of me losing the plot, including an internal examination that showed I was only 3cm dilated (bring on the tears). They suggested I have an epidural... yes please.

Epidural on board, watching the CTG machine show that I was having another contraction, that is the nicest thing to watch, know you should be in excruciating pain, but what you are doing is watching a line go up. But the other line (baby's heart beat) was showing the exact opposite. Each contractions caused Mark's heart beat to drop to about 50bpm, which for a baby is very very low. So about 10.30 someone (probably the obstetrician) came in and said "having a few issues, so we might just have to get this baby out) so emergency Caesarean it was.

I was all prepped for theatre, already had the epidural, Vince was coming in to watch as well. When we were all ready for the operation to start, I remember thinking where the hell is he, he's holding up this operation, I bet he's chatting up some nurse. Later he told me, he was dressed in the scrubs within 5 minutes and they made him wait. Sorry Vince, my bad.

Operation "Chop Christy Open" begins, birthing the shoulders I felt, otherwise it was marvellous. Vince was so excited, "I got to see your guts, no one else has ever seen your guts before."

Then we got to see the gorgeous little Mark Emmanuel Orset (as he was originally called) we later officially changed his name to Mark Emmanuel Lantz to make his schooling and essentially his life easier. He was still a little bloody, had what looked like red curly hair, in retrospect, he had the tiniest amount of blonde hair that had blood on it. His eyelids were swollen, and were for about a month... the reason, the cord was wrapped around his neck twice, sort of strangling him. Well that's my theory.

Off to recovery and I was drugged out of my brain, high as a kite actually. I was lying in my bed with my leg bent - my knee was outside of the covers, I remember asking in my drugged voice "what's that big white thing down there?"
"That's your leg, love" OMG that's soooo fuuunnnnnyyyyyy.

I was hooked up to a drip for about the next day and a half. Vince slept on the floor next to me. Marko roomed in with us. Breast feeding was a little problematic mainly due to the sheer number of different midwives all with slightly different theories on how it should work. I recall one woman walking in, asking me to "get ready" and then she started to flick my nipple with her finger... still not too impressed about that. Don't you think she should have asked for permission first?

Despite an emergency caesarean section, I insisted on being discharged after 4 days, as I knew Vince was leaving to work at the snow. We had about 3 days together. I was pretty low, Mum drove us to the edge of the city and Vince got out and started to hitch hike to Mt Buller and really out of our lives. I know he called me a few times, the 2am drunk call when he professed undying love for me (total bullshit and I called him on it), I remember yelling at him, I'm looking after your son whilst you are partying at a ski resort (oh and a little cleaning) and you wake me up at 2am with lies???? (oops I did it again).

Anyway after that HUGE life changing week. I was only 24 years old, newborn baby, crumbling relationship, we managed to pick ourselves up and get on with the business of loving the most amazing little baby who has grown into a great kid. Yes I have my problems with him, but really just totally normal teenager issues, we want him to do stuff, he doesn't want to do it! Simple as that.

Mum remembers there were hours where Mark would be lying on my lap and I would just be looking at him. No wonder we're so close. Anyway after about 18 months, I was still living at home. I was on the single parent pension and my dad said "OK Christy, this isn't going to be forever like this, what are you doing with your life, go back to work at a lab, or go to uni or something, you cannot be a pensioner". He was so right. I didn't want to go back to Melbourne Pathology where I was the shit kicker, no where to go in that company without uni, and I knew the scientists didn't do too much more than what I did, so there was little point in becoming a Medical Laboratory Scientist. But I did like the idea of nursing (they are nice people, I'd like to be nice) so I started my nursing degree in 2000 when I was 26 years old.

Also in that time period, Vince and I totally broke up, we had a couple of weekends at Mum & Dad's caravan in Eildon so he could get to know Mark, but it was all fruitless. I spent a lot of hours on the computer in that new thing called the "internet", I chatted to lots of guys on ICQ... went a little wild (oops again), and then somehow started talking/typing to a guy in Tullamarine who worked strange hours so was available to talk to me when I was online (remember dialup). Anyway we talked for hours and hours, he was nice, but I wasn't in love. One day we suggested we might meet for a drink. I didn't know this fella from a bar of soap really. So we agreed to meet at a pub half way between our houses, and we'd each bring a friend. I took Jo and Jamie brought Dave (who didn't admit he had a girlfriend and tried to chat up Jo - sorry Kirsty if you read this) we had a nice evening, but no sparks at all. But we kept on chatting, cos we got along really well. But by Easter of 2000.... well we were a fully fledged couple and haven't looked back. Jamie accepted Mark without question, Margie I believe was a little wary of Jamie's girlfriend who had an 18 month old son! But she loves me now.

Pressure

Who is this pressure coming from?

ME.

I don't want to go back to work after this baby is born, maybe not until he goes to school. I don't know how to achieve this.

I don't know if we can afford child care if I do go back to work.

I really want to move back to Melbourne, I've made my opinion known to lots of people, but now I don't feel like that is going to happen, so I feel like I've lost. Not sure exactly what I've lost, but if I go back to work at the John Hunter I'm sure it will be with my tail between my legs.

Still not feeling well, feel super guilty that I'm taking drugs to sleep. The worst part is the drugs didn't work last night, so today I'm foggy as well and sleep deprived.

Valentine's Day Recap

It was a doozy.

Jamie left at 5.40am as usual. I had not slept.. ok maybe I dozed, but no sleep. Ryan woke at 6am for his milk and then I put him back to bed, this did not work, but thankfully he just talked to himself. Mark up at 7am, insisting I get up also. Dragged myself out of bed and achieved the morning tasks.

Ryan was not himself yesterday, we feel molars are coming through.. pain. So he was a bit of a sookylala, and I put him back to bed and he slept until 10:30am, maybe even eleven. I dozed in that time.

We needed car parts, the engine of our Commodore "dropped" not sure how this happens, but maybe the baking heat of the past two weeks sped up the perishing process of the rubber boots holding it in place (that's what I think and I'm sticking to it) anyway quite dangerous to drive, so it was at Rocket's house waiting for me to order these "boots". When Jamie finally rang to tell me what to ask for, Auto1's response was "what size boot do you need"... oh shit! I don't know, Jamie didn't know, Rod didn't know. Sorry Jamie this is a job you need to work out for yourself, so after about 10 phone calls, of which 5 of them, Ryan was screaming! I gave up on car parts.

Around 12:30, time to head to Rebecca's house so she could babysit my little dude whilst I was at my antenatal appointment. It doesn't really feel fair to drag a 14 month old baby to a hospital to sit in his pram and be quiet. Ryan doesn't quite know the meaning of quiet at the moment, he's discovered his voice and likes to use it - loudly - to tell long intricate stories of complete babble.

Got to Metford, settled in Ryan, who I believe spent the afternoon driving his Buzz spaceship and laughing at Wilson - their white fluffly dog, Bella - the husky - was kept outside much to her disgust!

Appointment went really well. Had a lovely GP/gynae specialist who believed me and was willing to help me. My reflux is bad, I'm now on ranitidine bd. My sleeping sux (as you know) she has given me temazepam.... and I got 7 hours sleep last night. Jamie was a little upset that I wasn't able to say goodbye to him this morning (as I was in my induced coma). Spoke with the head of the department about my Caesarean, he thinks its quite reasonable. I'm booked for a 3 or 4D scan on Friday to look at the umbilical cord to make sure their are no early knots, to ease my anxiety over this. Quite looking forward to seeing the littlest Mr Storer in three days time. I hope Jamie is able to attend this appointment - going against my earlier argument that hospitals are no place for babies. Below is a self portrait of me at 33 weeks preggers!


Anyway, I quick dash out of the hospital, collected Mark at home on my way back to Metford to get Ryan. Then got a phone call from Jamie, get some brake fluid and meet me at Rocket's house to give him a car key. No worries mate. R fell asleep in the car and we went in and had a cup of tea. Then to Jesmond to get my drugs, home. Sat down for 5 minutes. Then Jamie came home and I had to drive him to Hexham to his helicopter meeting (yes you read that correctly) he is in a helicopter club, and they want him to build their website (hopefully for free membership, but that remains to be seen). He didn't get home until almost 10.30pm.

I think I got a Valentine's kiss from him.



Driving included: Home (Shortland) - Metford - New Lambton - Shortland - Metford - Tomago - Jesmond - Shortland - Hexham - Shortland. Maybe I didn't need the sleeping pill.... utter exhaustion might have done it.

The sad, pathetic life of Christy

I'm feeling ick. Lots of problems at the moment... (time for another list)

1. RLS - bad
2. Can't sleep because of #1
3. Anxiety because of #1
4. Sore ear - I'm pretty sure its a bite, skin started peeling off today
5. Top of right foot hurts
6. Lower abdo and upper left thigh pain, actually a little more like groin pain, should I call the delivery suite? (Reminding me a little of the labour from Ryan)
7. A sense of general heaviness
8. Puffy feet
9. Reflux
10. Slight nausea

Ok, that is more than enough. I'm really tired and want to sleep, but the fear of going to my bedroom is overwhelming. How do I turn off the thoughts??????????

Sore Ear

Ok this is getting pathetic.

The top of my ear hurts, its all red, no cuts that Jamie can see. At least its my left for love ear, I think I'd get paranoid if it was my right ear (right for spite).

I can't bake anymore. My cupcakes failed last night. They all sunk :(
Failed profiteroles.
Failed Mars Bar slice.

Quite depressing really.

Life when you are 32 weeks pregnant

32 weeks sounds a long way through, but there are 8 weeks left, that is 2 months! In reality of life, two months is a long time, but when you get closer to 40 (ok I do have 3 years) time moves quickly.

Good things that have happened this week:

• The heat went away (but its coming back)
• Work is good
• I'm going to have a kickass Tupperware party on Friday - its only Tuesday and I have 7 confirmed guests... only have comfy seating for 5.. will have to bring the kitchen chairs in.
• I've made two slices
• I've made the bed two days in a row.
• Two less mice are in the world.

Now for the bad stuff:

• Restless Leg Syndrome and insomnia. Words fail me how awful this is.
• Ryan got heat rash and is feeling poorly, off his food (which he is completely hopeless with at the best of times) and more importantly slow with his milk.
• Mark isn't listening and I feel like a banshee, threatening him is the only thing working.
  
• Mark is not really talking to me, unless he wants something, he finds it funny to scare me, trick me, push me to my limits. And this boy was wonderful last week.
• Jamie is sooo busy, I miss him. He is working on his boat, helicopter, computer or second computer job as well as working full time. Sometimes I feel we are tag team wrestlers, hand slap as one takes over the babysitting duty. When I get home from work its his cue to go out, and a bit vice versa.
• Lack of interest in cooking.
• Two failed baking jobs yesterday, I wanted to make profiteroles and forgot to put the eggs in, hence they didn't rise, I know they needed eggs, but just omitted them, waste of time, energy and ingredients.

Ahhh don't you just love a list. Quite obsessed with them. Mark's mate Mads is coming after school due to a footy training day, so Mark has requested I clear the kitchen bench, and could I "try to be a bit nicer"... I replied "if you do be a bit nicer"
Humph, will see how we go..

Too many thoughts

I jokingly said on Facebook last night. I need a pensive. A pensive is a type of bird bath that you put all of your extra thoughts into, so you don't need to hold onto them all. I think it would be a good idea if such a thing really existed.

So what is it I'm thinking about:

The birth of my next baby, due in two months time. I want a c-section and it appears the powers that be at the hospital are quite happy to let me do that. The doc I saw yesterday is actually a GP with an advanced interested in obstetrics - so much so that he helps run the clinic - he raised an interesting point with me. Are you finished your family after this baby? Well yes I am. I have said all along that 3 is enough, I won't be going back to "try for a girl", I don't want to have to think about a new car to transport 4 children, the cost associated with 4 children, the car seats, the bedrooms, the school fees, sport fees, toys... well to be totally honest I'm done. I suggested to Jamie recently that he go for a vasectomy (didn't get a favourable response). Anyway this doctor suggestion a tubal ligation, its not something I thought about, mainly because I didn't' think they did it any more. It totally makes sense. No need to worry about contraception, no suprise baby at 45 when I think I'm hitting menopause. Plus my belly is already open (that was Jamie's comment, no need for me to have an operation). Anyone out there in blogland had a Tubal Ligation, any fors or againsts?

I'm a woman, I can change my mind.

Totally changed my mind about quilting. I shall keep it as a hobby I'll do later. Quite silly to start something when I'll soon have a toddler and a newborn to keep me busy. I'd only start it and then feel guilty about not finishing it.

Today was Anti-D injection. This is because I somehow got the quite rare blood group of B negative. I know I went thru it with mum and dad and neither of them are BNeg, so I'm unique. It also means 3 needles during EACH pregnancy - I think.

I recall after Mark was born, after 8 hours of labour and an emergency C-section that my arm hurt. I found this very odd, why would my arm hurt if I just gave birth to a baby.... ahhhh Anti-D.

Hot

That is a profound title for a post isn't it?

I'm hot. I don't cope to well being hot.

I'm 29 weeks pregnant to boot, which raises my internal temperature.

Jamie says I'm becoming very boring because I just keep whining about the heat.

Well once the heat gets turned off, I'll stop whining.

Had a lovely visit from Kathryn and Eoin today. He's a dear little boy, hard to believe he's only 3 months, must be the hair, he looks quite grown up. Ryan did the thing that bigger babies do, whack and try to put the dummy in. But he kept missing and tried to shove the thing in his eye or cheek. Eoin didn't seem to mind (and thankfully either did his mother)

Our electricity went off today for 2 hours. I live with ceiling fans, I don't think I could live without them to be honest. So two hours sans fans was a challenge. Thank you Energy Australia for restoring my power :)))