I don't understand humans.

Another series of thoughts by me.

I attended a conference last week.  There was a speaker Dr Marie Etienne from the USA.  She is of Haitian descent.  She was talking about the Haiti Earthquake which occurred in 2010.  Most of the country is still living in tents as the infrastructure has not been built yet.

Her wording was "under the tent".  When people live under the tent there is a lack of electricity a lack of private and "of course" violence and sexual assault occurs.

HUH???  Why is this "of course"

Tangent..... (it will come back together), I watch a lot of Law & Order SVU.  Every episode is about rape or some sort of sexual exploitation.  A recent episode had a young drunk almost passed out woman lying on the ground.  A couple of youngish men walked by and looked at the woman, instead of helping her home or to a hospital, they unzipped their pants and raped her.

HUH???


What is wrong with men who don't appear to have control over themselves.  I know that if my father or my husband was in either of these situations nothing would happen. Children would be safe.  Women would be safe.  Why are there so many people out there who think that other peoples bodies are their for their enjoyment.

Also, how is rape enjoyable.  Surely a woman or a man who is "liking what you are doing" is so much better.

Decisions.

I work as a nurse in a GP clinic and well over half of my patients need to lose weight.  Most of them discuss it with me.  Everyone is nervous to hop on the scales.  Some are lighter and some are heavier.  Every one of them I discuss about having to make a decision.

The decision to lose weight.

My weight has been steadily increasing over the past 6 years.  Reading back recently over this blog, it might even be over the past 10 years, maybe even 15.

Why won't I make the decision to lose weight?  Why do I sabotage myself all the time.

I'm now close to 20kg heavier than I should be, and I am still a unsure as to whether a decision has been made.  I need to exercise, I need to eat healthier stuff, my downfall for the past year has been bread and chocolate.

How do you "make the decision" to actually try, not just put in appearances to get people off your back.

TV

I love TV, I shouldn't love TV, but I do...  my current favourites are

We have loved this one for several (or a few) years now.  Violence, sex, confusing story lines and lots of killing.  Just finished the latest season and it was OMG

This is very similar to GOT, sex, violence, violence, violence and an interesting story line, based on historical events.  LOVED IT.

I'm new to this series, and I'm almost through the first of three seasons (need to finish it before we cancel Foxtel.

This is the little boys favourite, they enjoy the magic and the sword fights without people bleeding or actually being killed, Its funny when the boys say "did he get dead?"

Another instalment in my trews.

Closing the Gap.  I know it through the healthcare system.  Aboriginal people in Australia are entitled to more services that non-Aboriginal people due to their increased health needs.

Right now in 2015, the average life expectancy for an Aboriginal man is 67 years.
The life expectancy for the rest of the Australian men is 82 years.
That is a massive gap.  Healthcare and education is one way to close this gap.

Imprisonment rates:
In 2014 there were 33 thousand people in prison.  Of that 9200 were of ATSI descent. 27% of the total prison population are Aboriginal.
23 million people live in Australia and 669000 are Aboriginals, therefore almost 3% of the TOTAL population are Aboriginal.

What the discrepancy.
I have an as yet not researched theory.  I do plan to research this.. might do a PHD on it.

Mark turns 17 on Friday, if he went out on Friday night and got blotto, the police I would imagine would bring him home (or call me to get him) and he'd sleep it off, get yelled at by me and then not much else.

If Anthony* the Indigenous young man of 17 did exactly the same thing, he would be arrested for public drunkenness and have to go to the cells and then the magistrates court and so on and so forth (in the words of Dr Gredina)

Which means if one is Indigenous you are much more likely to be sent to prison for a "silly" crime than one that is more serious.

I shall now workshop my thesis with myself.

My Trews

Russell Brand has a YouTube show called The Trews, this thoughts on the news... news isn't true, the trews is news (I made up that tagline)

Anyway there are heaps of items from the news that makes my blood boil.  But I'm not very sure how my friends are going to respond, or if they are interested, so I will do my version of the trews here.

#1.  Cancelling ones citizenship if fighting for ISIS.
This is a massive news item.  That being said, I can't find a link to anything easily on the ABC news site.  Except maybe here.   My thoughts on this.  It's a huge thing to do, to strip someone of their citizenship, its an even bigger thing to do it if they don't have another nationality or really don't have any ties to that community.  Say for example me, I could be stripped of my Australian Citizenship should I ever to fight for ISIS (of course I am not), and then "they" say well I could go back to Canada or Germany even.  Yeah, I have huge ties there!  Anywhoo I am getting off track.  Who is this law going to apply to... at this stage, maybe 20 people.  Parliament is practically stopped over an issue that is relevant for 20 families.  Stupid.

Ashamed to be Australian.

For the past year or so, I have been listening to my radio about the Royal Commission into the Institutional Response to Child Abuse.  This means the Catholic Church, the Salvation Army, the Boy Scouts, elite private schools, they all have a very dark history of child physical and sexual abuse.  It has been harrowing listening and I hope they give the journalists following it some counseling as on my drive home, I am often in tears.  Anyway, this royal commission has just finished its public hearings and they are in their discussions to make their report to the government. 

Whilst this has been happening.... there have been subdued reports followed by very public declarations that sexual abuse is occuring to underage asylum seekers on Nauru and Mannis Island.  These are detention centres for people fleeing their home country to make their lives in Australia - granted some of them are economic refugees, but most of these refugee get asylum status after what is normally quite a long detention. 

So far there has been many reports that long detention CAUSES mental health problems, there are huge instances of self harm, self neglect and suicide attempts.  Yet the Australian government put CHILDREN in these centres, the government that I had a hand in voting for (it wouldn't matter what side I vote for, the policy is the same).  I don't want to be associated with a government that voluntarily sets people up for life long mental illness.  But they are also covering up the sexual abuse that is occurring there.   So our government which is condemning the catholic church of covering up the pedophiles is doing exactly the same thing at the same time they are trying to find out what happened in the catholic church. 

As an individual person, what can I do?  I would like to vote them out, but the other side will do the same.

Things I don't get...

Two posts in one day, cos I gotta get that pic off my front page. WHY do I take such horrible photos (that is an interesting question, but not the topic of this post)

Why do "ordinary" people have haters.  I am grown woman of almost 42 years old.  From what I can work out, no one hates me.  People I know might not talk to me, they might find me dull.  But I don't have people who hate me.

People from that wonderful group called "My Facebook Friends" seem to have people who hate them, people who talk behind their backs, people who have other people making their lives hell.  I can't figure out why.

Do you think it is from marriage break ups, so there are a group on the exes side that is against you.

Well as I have titled this.... I just don't get it.

Things that bug the crap out of me #45

Easter, when did it become what it is today!  I sort of get Easter Eggs, but what I don't understand is LOTS of Easter eggs, or worse still - presents!  My Facebook feed is full of people giving a lot of presents to their kids at Easter.  UGH.  Please excuse the dreadful pic of me, but the boys are cute.

My eldest turns 16

Mark turned 16 years old today.
He has had a huge week.
Got his first part time job at McDonald's at Tullamarine Airport yesterday - interview and offered the job straight away.  Orientation starts on Wednesday.
Today was his birthday.
Got his learner's permit on the first try and went for his first drive with his uncle.

Some time off.

Having a bit of R&R, forced R&R due to some surgery.  Hopefully it means I'm fixed, but I'm not counting my chickens before they are hatched.  No more details ok.

I miss my younger two boys.  They have been at my inlaws for the last week.  And I miss them.  I miss their squishy faces, their enthusiasm for life.  I miss every detail about them (ok maybe not the whining)

Superheroes

Wrestling!

So two weeks ago, we had a car accident.  I was travelling along Sharps Road and a car pulled out of a side street without checking and into the side of her car I went - BAM.  Me with two little kids in the backseat and then a written off car.  Six days later we were paid out!  Still can't believe that the insurance was so quick.  

Car at the car cemetery.

My beautiful baby, love love love.

Feeling proud

My sister and I have a business.

You can visit is here.

We have sourced product, some great, some well quite terrible. 
We have written business plans, budgets, partnership agreements.
We have opened bank accounts, PayPal, merchant accounts.
We have (with my husbands assistance) made a wonderful website.
We have learned so many new things.

Personally, I became the photographer.  The quality of my photos have improved remarkably.

My first ones were terrible.  Poor background, poor depth well just awful.
Now I can say I'm proud of my photos, they are what will draw people to our jewellery (did I mention it was selling jewellery?)

The pics I am most proud of are:

A nice stretchy bracelet

I love this sparkly and pink bracelet set

I love the blurriness of the hair and it was styled just the way I wanted it.  Cute earring too.

This pendant is just beyond beautiful

Ben's 3rd Birthday

My baby turned 3.  He is still so little.  He is so young.  Feels like he's been around for ever.  My baby is so clever.  He is a daredevil.

We hired this awesome thing for the party

The birthday boy and his new easel from Nan and Pop

Posing (sort of)

Marko the magnificent

Blowing out the candles

The birthday cake.

Extremely happy with this birthday cake

Fun in the Jumping Castle

Wyatt, Ryan and Toby having some fun

Ben and his dad having a quiet moment

News

Not news from my family this time, but the actual news.  I'm not a writer. I'm not much of a consumer of news.  But I listen to the ABC all the time.  We don't ever watch the evening news and I don't read the newspaper.  Channel 9 is on at work, so I get snippets of news there but essentially all of my news comes from the ABC.  This is the story of the the last week.

Sunday - It was an Extreme to Catastrophic Fire Warning Day.  Ever since Black Saturday in 2009, the way fires are discussed in Victoria has changed.  Phrases have new meaning that didn't make sense 5 years ago.
Emergency Warning - there is a fire that is very close, it is not safe for you to leave.  Shelter in place.
Watch and Act - there is a out of control fire nearby, if your fire plan was to leave you must leave now.
Advice - The fire is still close, you should take extreme precautions and listen to the radio, watch the CFA app etc.
These three phrases are now synonomous with Total Fire Ban days, they really don't need elaborating on, but they are.  The ABC went into emergency broadcasting on Sunday, which despite the danger is actually very interesting radio.  They bring their big guns in and lots of live crosses and callers talking about where the fire is up to.  THANKFULLY there were no lives lost in the fire, but over 40 homes have been destroyed and countless livestock.

Monday - what fire?  Schappelle Corby was released from her Balinese prison.  I'm still at a loss as to who cares about this woman (other than her family).  The media seem to care, the media seem to think we care.  The entire morning on channel nine was devoted to journalists trying to work out when Schappelle was coming out.  It was a very negative day.

Tuesday - More Schappelle and a little bit about fire - very smoky today.

Wednesday Evening came news that a young boy Luke Batty was killed after his cricket training from severe head injuries and his killer was soon after shot by police.  It turns out that the man was Luke's father and goodness knows why he killed him (it doesn't seem to be about not trying at cricket, rather a horrible family violence and separation issue)  All of Thursday was all about Luke and what can be done about Family Violence.  It made me so sad.  I'm still sad. 

Interesting how the media jumps from one topic to another!  Just like me.

A new phase

A POOL.
Its been a confused summer.  Started off quite cold and then it got HOT.  Really hot, 4 days in a row over 40C a day reprieve and then back up.  Its sticky sweaty hot.  So we got a pool.  Not a fabulous in-ground pool, but a fabulous above ground pool, a blow up one.  Ok,its a kiddie pool but its amazing.  But rules state that water over 30cm needs to be fenced.  We are rules people, so a fence we got.

The original position, was far too awkward, so we moved it.

The finished area.  Perspex pool fencing and gazeebo for sun protection.

My nudist

Getting splashed by their big brother.

Big bro.

Gorgeous boys

This is me - Final... thank goodness.

Miscellaneous:
*What is the most daring thing you've done?
Dare-devil daring was a bungee jump and rap-jump in NZ.  I hated the rap-jump (walking or running down the side of a building tethered to the top), it was terrifying and I wasn't "cool" about it.  The bungee was in Queenstown and also wasn't cool, but it was fun.

*What is the stupidest thing you've done?
Probably running off with Vince.  Should have left it at one day and a life time of "what ifs"

*What is your most embarrassing moment? (Or moments)
Nah, I'm pretty cool.  I have a lot of why did I ask that moments at my work.  "Is this your mother?" "No its my wife" and most recently I asked an asian woman who was supporting her friend during a baby's vaccination if she was the nanny.  Let the ground open up and swallow me.

*What choices in life would you like to have a redo on?
I'd like to stand up for myself a bit better.  Although it would mean no Mark, I wish I wasn't able to contact Vince after our first meeting.  But I can't ever say that, it would mean no Mark!

*What is your general attitude toward life?
Not too great at the moment,  I'm finding almost every aspect very challenging.  Hoping for a pick me up soon.


Personality:
*What kind of personality do you have?  
I've evolved.  I was painfully shy.  Blushing like crazy and not able to speak.  Now I'm very talkative, but still essentially shy. 

*How has your personality changed over the years?  What made it change?
Isn't that an interesting question after how I answered the first one.  I'm sure being a nurse has changed me, being a mother has changed me.  Nursing makes you talk to people and not always people you like.  Older men (like 70+) flirt with nurses something terrible, and it all has to be taken in your stride.  Coaxing out secret information is a skill too.

*How well do you associate with others?
I can talk to anyone.  Once I know you, I'm chatty.

*What makes you nervous/happy/angry/surprised/scared/etc?
Nervous - anything to do with decisions.
Happy - family
Angry - family, breaking rules.
Surprised - ??
Scared - Jamie or Paul driving, mice and dogs.



Hobbies:
*What are your current hobbies?
Facebook would be my hobby. Baking is a need. Taking pics and scrapbooking is a sideline.

*What hobbies have you had in the past?
Scrapbooking was a passion.

*How often do you get to do your hobbies?
Its being bothered to do it.  I am always on Facebook and it distracts me from everything else.

*What hobbies do you wish you could start? 
I want to ride a bike.  I want to scrapbook daily.







Death:
*What would you like to do before you die?  (Bucket list)
I want to travel with Jamie.
I want to see my sons grow up and become amazing men.
I want to have all of my daughters-in-law (or son in law if that is the way it turns out) love me and feel as comfortable with me as their own parents.
I want to own a sports car.
Not much else.
 
*What are your beliefs about death?
I believe that I will leave my body and go to heaven to live with God.
 
*Are you scared to die?
I'm scared to die too early or painfully.
 
*How would you like to go?
The same as everyone else, peacefully in my sleep when I'm old before I get sick.  
 
*What are your final wishes?
If anyone dare let me live in a coma I will come back and haunt you.  I would rather pull out of treatment too early than to live the way some of patient's live.  No life support, no dialysis and there had better be a euthanasia pill.
 
*What are your wishes for your funeral and burial?
Could not care less, don't put me in an expensive casket, happy to be cremated.
 
*What would you like people to say about you when you're gone? 
She was an amazing mother and grandmother.  Man she made the best (insert food item) I don;t know what I want to be known for.  Maybe something a little more obscure like a pie that is not common in Australia. 

This is me - Part 17/18

Nature:
*Where is your favourite place to go to get away from it all?
I strangely like to grocery shop.  I like having time (on my own) to stroll through the aisles and look at everything.  

*What outdoor activities do you like to participate in?
As little as possible.  I would like to walk.  I would like to ride a bike.  I would love to swim.  I would like to a lot of things.

*What are some of your favorite outdoor memories?
Torquay when I was a kid would be my favourite.  Strangely I don't think I've been there since I met Vince.  I don't believe I have been there with Jamie... will have to rectify that, change my memories to the new man (only had him for 14 years)


Travelling:

*Where in the world have you been?
Lets start from the beginning:
Germany - 1973
Canada - 1974-1979
Australia - 1979 - present
New Zealand - 1983
England, Scotland, Wales - 1993
France, Italy, Austria, Germany, Netherlands - 1993
New Zealand - 1997
All over Australia - 1997
Queensland - 2001
Thailand - 2013
 
*Where was your favorite vacation? 
As a child my favourite holiday was going in our wind up caravan to the beach.

Teenager was our big family holiday to Uluru, three weeks off school and pure family time.

Adult - I did love NZ, but looking back there are so many dark memories.  That is now been taken over by our trip to Thailand.  I love that we were able to take all three kids on a 2.5 week vacation in the sun.  We were careful with money which in hindsight wasn't as "fun" as it could have been.  But what an experience.
 
*Where would your dream vacation be?
I really want to go to America, I want to drive across country in a big ole car like in Thelma and Louise.  I want to go to New York, to Texas to the midwest.  I want to experience a diner and all those things I read about on blogs and see on tv.  I really want to do it as a couple - not a family (is that wrong?).  I want our next holiday to be a cruise.  Invite the whole family and all room separately but can meet up as required.

*How do you like to travel?
I don't care, I just want to do it more often.  Not a fan of flying with toddlers, but they are growing up.   

This is Me - Part 14, 15 and 16

Health:
*How is your overall health?
Gone downhill since I turned 40.  Aches, pains, and degeneration in my back, shoulder and wrist.  Long standing issue with Restless Leg Syndrome, insomnia, anxiety and some gynaecological issues that don't need to be discussed as this time.

*Have you had any surgeries? (If yes, give details.)
Wisdom teeth out at 19 years old.
Caesarean section done at 24 years old
Laparoscopy done to check for infertility around 33 years old.
Cholecystectomy (gall bladder out) at 39
Will have two more surgeries at the same time later this year.

*Have you had any broken bones?  Nope

*Do you have allergies? Nope

*What are you doing to keep healthy now?
Trying to exercise, but am failing miserably.  Trying to lose weight and am also failing miserably.  Next week when it cools down a bit, I shall get back at it.  What I want to do is walk and eat more vegetables.


Part 15
Around the World:
*What major world events have happened in your lifetime?
My remembered lifetime.  
1982: Prince Charles and Diana got married, I actually remember watching that and I was only 9 


1989: Tiananmen Square protest and massacre. I was in year 10 at school and recall watching the protesters grow in number every day and saying to my parents, I need to go to China, I need to know what it feels like to be in a crowd of one million people.. then a couple days later the army came in.. and the rest is history.

1997: Princess Diana killed in a car crash.  I was in NZ about to return to Australia and our taxi driver told us she can been killed and we didn't believe him.  He had to turn the radio on to prove it.  What a shock.

2001: World Trade Centre terrorist attack, we were home here at Gordon St.  I had fallen asleep on the couch and woke up around 11pm and the first tower was already hit and was smouldering as we have all seen a billion times now.  I was confused as to what movie it was, so changed channels to get the name of the movie (you know what I mean) and it was the same on channel 9, same on channel 10, same on the ABC... what the hell?  I woke Jamie up and like everyone else stayed up most of the night watching it on the telly.  Surreal.

*Has it affected who you are now? 
A major thing that really affected me at the time was in 1993, I was 20 years old.  It was the killing spree of Paul Denyer.  He was at the time known as the Frankston Killer.  No I didn't live in Frankston.  But it was the complete randomness of the killings, they were all thrill kills, pure stranger killings and I was so worried I would be next.  It was the first time in my life that I thought I could be hurt and it changed the way I did things.  

*Who was the President when you were born?  Who is it now?
US:                       Richard Nixon
                            Barack Obama
Australia:              Gough Whitlam
                            Tony Abbott (unfortunately) 
Canada:                Pierre Trudeau
                            Stephen Harper
NZ:                      Norman Kirk
                            John Key

*What natural disasters have you been in?
The closest we came to a natural disaster was a massive storm in Newcastle, the whole story is written here.  We didn't live in Victoria during Black Saturday, so haven't been in a bush fire, missed a cyclone in Far North Queensland by about day.  Been very safe actually. 

Part Sixteen:
 
Politics: 
*Are you involved in politics?  How so?
Not very at all.  We were quite unionised back in the mid 2000s due to a long strike Jamie was on with Boeing. You can read about it here and here 

*Are you a specific political party? 
I am 100% labour.  
 
*How do you choose who to vote for?
I chose Labour.  I can't cope with the other side.
 
*Are you happy with the Government?
Not at all.  I hate our refugee policy.  I find it embarrassing, that we would lock up, and pay a lot of money to lock up desperate people. I don't get that votes in Parliament are not all conscience votes.  I don't like the rudeness of people in politics.
 
*What would you change if you could?
 I would let the other side be in charge.

This is me - Part Thirteen

Food:
*What are your favorite foods?
Main course: I love curry, any Indian, Sri Lankan, Thai or middle eastern.  Not a fan of too hot, but I like it better than plain meat.  I'd love to do rice for breakfast, but find it challenging.
But, I prefer sweet, anything sweet and recently I feel I'm addicted to bread, its not a want, its a NEED.
 
*What are your favorite desserts?
Anything really, I love ice cream.  Cake. Slice.  Pies.  Pav.  Anything sweet I'm there.
 
*Do you like to cook or bake?  What are your favorites to make?
I love baking.  Trying new things, but my family are my hinderance.  They are not fans of anything new.  I do love making a curry too.
 
*Do you have any food allergies?
Thankfully no.  But know a lot of people who are gluten intolerant, so have experimented a LOT with gluten free cooking (and I hate it)
 
*What are some foods you have a hard time saying "no" to?
Cake, biscuits, anything that is free ;)
 
*What foods do you HAVE to have name brand?  Which can you do generic?
Can't say I really "get" that.  Marko hates SPC baked beans but I can't tell the difference.
 
*Do you try to eat healthy?
I'd like to.  I want to eat vegetables with dinner.  I want to experiment with healthy stuff, but my family again is the downfall, there are SO many dislikes in my family that there is very little that is acceptable.
 
*Do you prefer eating out?  Where? 
We love take away.  Haven't done many restaurants in our life.  Mainly due to Jamie not liking much.

Mum's Birthday.

I think I can put some sneaky pics on here as I don't have many people looking.  Here is a snippet from my mother's 76th birthday party.  The whole family came.  But I strangely did not get one of my parents together.

Happy cousins (what's with the face Ryan)

Mum and her daughters

All the girls.

Jo and her kids (can't believe she let me take a pic)

Pop and Mark

Mum and the grandkids

Lovely one of Sheena

Me and mum

Playing ball (yes Ben is around)

Pop showing the boys the iPad and his new favourite game.